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Letters to Nowhere

Monday, May 09, 2005

Lepers and Lysol

Sunday while sitting in the house with my son I hear a knock on the door. I was dressed in that quaint style known as "OMG Please don't let it be someone I know!!". This does not put me at ease. However, there is someone waiting.

I look out the window of the door and see.. a .. uh.. man type thing outside. No way in HELL am I going to open the door and offer hospitality.

I crack the door.

Me: "Can I help you?"
It: I ran out of gas. Can I borrow your phone?

ACK! This man looked to be about 30ish. He was wearing a hat over very stringy dirty hair. His short sleeved shirt had seen better days. What concerned me the most was the sores all over the (blessedly little) skin I could see. He had lesions of some type. They looked almost like oozing chickenpox. But not really. All I could think was Leper!

And this man wanted to use my phone! An item I place near my MOUTH!

Now I know how those church folks felt on this day...

I grudgingly got my phone. I handed it out the door after dialing for him. I closed the door and left him and the phone outside. No way he's coming in my house.

I listened as he had a loud conversation with someone to "just please bring me some damn gas". I ran to the bath room. I got the rubbing alcohol, Lysol and cotton balls.

I graciously cracked the door when he knocked again. Smiled as he thanked me. Took the phone back using only 2 fingers, closed the door and then began the funk killing assault!


  • Not to scare you or freak you out or anything (but I'm gonna) right now I'm taking microbiology in school and well...

    One of the things I learned is that there are some germs that are just resistent to dying in the manner by which you proposed.

    I hope any cooties he had.....did die.

    Or else.....

    *runs like the wind to keep from getting seriously hurt*

    By Blogger Shannon, at 12:08 PM  

  • On another note - I am so glad you weren't tempted to invite him inside to use your phone - thank heavens it was cordless. We've had a lot of incidents in our area where this ploy is used to gain access to homes for any number of illegal purposes. Another favourite is the panhandling fraud who goes door to door begging for money for a non-existant car dilemma.

    By Anonymous JustSue, at 4:40 AM  

  • another "sting", is where the guy asking to use the phone dials a premium rate number, and runs up your bill, he of course gets a cut of profits.

    you might want to check your phone bill.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:43 PM  

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