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Letters to Nowhere

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Cyber Cheaters

I was hanging out in chat last night out of pure boredom. There were two women giving each other hell. When a 3rd party asked what the problem was, one of the ladies said "We wouldn't have a problem if she hadn't cam fucked my man".

Maybe It's just me.. but my reaction was pretty blasé. A bit of head shaking and wanting to throw my hands in the air and I was done. But, it did get me thinking about men that cheat, and how women react to it.

My son's father cheated on me. We were young, blah blah blah.. It boils down to him being where he shouldn't have been, doing things he knew he shouldn't have been. Who was I mad at? HIM!

For all I know, the other party didn't even know I existed. I only met her "after". The person I place the responsibility on was him. He knew he was in a "committed" relationship. He knew it was wrong. He knew it would hurt me if I ever found out. And it did. I still have trust issues where men are concerned. (sadly he's not the only man that's strayed in my life).

So, enter cyber sex. A lot of men and woman get on cam and do a version of Show and Tell for sexual satisfaction. While it's not something I particularly enjoy or do, I understand alot of people engage in it and I understand why. For some it's just the thrill of showing, a feeling of power, a way of boosting self esteem (which I find ironic). For other's their (real life) spouse may be deployed or away for work, it maybe the only sexual contact they have for long periods of time.

Is cyber sex cheating? I'm torn on that question. I would be hurt and angry were I to find out my love was watching women fondle themselves while pleasuring himself, probably telling them things that I would assume I would be the only person to hear. It would be difficult to take and I would be upset. However, I don't think it would be a relationship breaker, assuming of course, he was willing to stop. In my opinion both the men and the women involved in casual (not involving 2 parties with some real life connection) cyber sex are nothing but really sophisticated masturbation tools. It's a Hustler mag that responds to input. Nothing more than a more modern version of porno. And both parties usually know that, on some level.

Don't be angry at the woman that's flashing rack and crack at your man, be angry at your man. He could have hit the little X in the upper right at anytime.


  • Why get mad at your man? Is he really cheating? Where does one draw the line?

    Lets assume you consider smoking to be bad. Would you be mad at your man if he smoked? Or just if he looked at packets of smoke.

    By Blogger Peeyush, at 10:42 AM  

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