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Letters to Nowhere

Monday, November 01, 2004

Landings = Takeoffs, right?

I recently heard a radio commercial that had me a bit worried. It was talking about some low airfare offer from a specific airline, whose name I can't remember.

This offer was so good, so cheap, so perfect that it would restore your health. I could feel my gall stones exploding from the pure joy of cheap airfare. Ok maybe not. I'm sure that was the intended warm, fuzzy, get me the hell away from where I am right now feeling they wanted to portray.

And it worked, more or less, until the end... At the end of the radio spot they had a 'disclaimer'. You know what I'm talking about.. the whispered small print. There disclaimer was: Price does not include federal aviation tax of $3.15 per takeoff and per landing...

Wha.. Wha.. WHAT? PER takeoff and PER landing. Is this necessary? I was under the impression those two figures should be the same. Hmm Let's do the math. I take off in Atlanta.... .... ... do you think I don't assume there will be a landing?

It's like they were telling me, subconsciously, you might not have a landing.. ha ha ha .. They could have said a $6.30 charge per connection, per flight, per SOMETHING. At least then I wouldn't have the feeling they were suggesting that my plane might not, under some circumstances, be landing on a runway somewhere.

So, dad.. the next time I fly to Canada, if the plane explodes into a fiery ball of death, make sure you get the $3.15 refund from the Feds.. Cuz I never got to use my "landing" charge.


  • To be honest I think we all should make sure our families know about the refund. But you know the Feds, they'll say the plane did land. It might be in peices, but it's down!! Technicalities...LOL I Love your Humor... Take care!

    By Blogger Love, at 8:22 PM  

  • If the cost can beat $3.50, one can pack parachutes and avoid landing altogether.

    By Blogger Peeyush, at 7:36 PM  

  • Works pays for my takeoff and landing fees. They can go and ask for it back if they want it.

    -= Fins =-

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:54 PM  

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