My Hick Son

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Translation:
Me: What are you going to do?

Son: Ok We are gonna go to Toot’s. First we’re gonna drive up to Toot’s. Then I’m gonna get some long boots. And Toot’s gonna take me where that big ‘ole lake is. Some parts are over my head, but, and there’s some snakes over there but that’s why I’ll be wearing very long boots. It takes one bite of my boots, but I’ll be wearing those long ones.

Me: And what are you going to do while you’re there?

Son: Fish, I’m gonna catch a giant catfish. They got giant catfish over there, ‘bout this big. Bout big as that trout I caught.

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Oh yeah, and I'm getting married in 13 days. Yep. Me. In. White. Married.

Of course Chris, my cousin was talking about giving me away. I quipped, "I don't need to be given away. It's been given away more than fruit cake."