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Letters to Nowhere

Thursday, May 22, 2008

So, now that I've started...

I wrote a few months ago about how busy we had been. For a while there we had not updated our blog for quite a while, and we claimed to being so occupied with our lives. It has been a strange time for us.

As we told you before, we had to make a whirlwind trip to Southern British Columbia to have my wife and son officially "enter" the country, and that we had time to visit my family there at that time. We celebrated an early Christmas with them, then went back to Yellowknife. I said it was timely; it certainly was.
I knew that my father had cancer, but we didn't find out until that December trip just how extensive it was. It turned out that it had spread beyond the area where it was first found, and had settled in other areas of his body, including a tumour in his brain. It was a difficult trip, because when we were there, Dad had to be rushed to the hospital, due to over-medication. For a son, especially a youngest son, it's difficult to take the opposite role from the one you are used to. My father has always been larger than life for me; sort of indomitable. But supporting my father as he sat semiconcious in a chair was awful. He was very weak, and hard as it obviously was for my father and family to see him that way, it was especially hard on me, I think. The huge hands that he used to tie a fly, or chop wood, or manhandle a rototiller were still there, but I was holding them, comforting him, trying to keep him awake enough to be able to get him on a stretcher. Fortunately, they were able to get his meds straightened out, and we were able to enjoy a visit, and an early Christmas. The last one with him, as it turned out. The rest of my family were able to enjoy one last Christmas with him too.

My father passed away on January 23, 2008.

Another whirlwind trip for me down to Southern BC, just long enough to help put together a memorial service, and a power point presentation for my father. It was awful, but it was also very nice. It was gratifying to see how many people your parents touch over the years. The small hall in the town were I grew up was jampacked with friends and family.

The time after has been strange. I have yet to weep, unlike my family, who do so daily. Perhaps this will come once we place his remains. It's a wonderful place not far from the first house we grew up in. Most of his ashes will go there, some at Cathedral Lakes Park, which he loved. The view from the graveyard features a scene not unlike the one below.

I miss my father, and think of him every day. A fine man, and though I never told him, a good father.


  • The trip ended up happening at the right time it sounds like, I'm glad you were there to spend the holiday with your family.

    I'm sorry that the circumstances weren't the best but you were there when he needed you to be and that's so very important....and I'm sure he knew hon.

    *huge hugs*

    By Blogger Anna, at 3:32 PM  

  • Speaking of weeping....that made me cry like a baby. I was happy you made it down there though...it helped me through....
    It was good to see him at Christmas, but that was the last time i did...makes me feel bad for not going down and seeing him in the hospital. But I guess you cant change the past.
    Love you dad!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:54 PM  

  • Les and family,
    I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your father. My prayers are with you and your family. I know how desolate and lost you feel when you lose someone as special as your father. I still miss mine even though it has been 3 1/2 years since he passed away. (He was Jennifer's Grandpa on her mother's side). It seemed like a nightmare at the time because it was so unexpected. The most important thing to remember is that you will never truly lose him because he will always be in your heart and thoughts. I'm sure that you have some very happy memories of him and you doing things while you were growing up. I know it been said that you really don't know how much you love someone until they are gone. That is certainly true. We learn to cherish those left behind even more so. On a happier note, tell Jennifer that Shantel got married on the 23rd of April. Jake is a really wonderful man who treats Shan like a princess. I am so glad to see her happy again! Of course they wanted me to marry them so I went down to Jax. They wanted to be married in Folkston (like a lot of people in our family has done). I guess she thought it was a family tradition or something. I didn't care where they got married, just as long as they were happy with their decision. Anyways, I would love to see some pictures of Canada if you would be so kind as to e-mail me some. I think Jennifer has my e-mail address. I didn't mean to write a book, but again, I wish to express my sympathy in the loss of your Dad. I'm sure he was a great person to know. Love to All!

    By Anonymous Aunt Cheryle, at 12:49 AM  

  • This comment has been removed by the author.

    By Blogger The Witch Doctor, at 4:41 PM  

  • I apologize and have deleted my last comment... I forgot to look at the bottom of the post again...

    I'm sorry for your loss Les *hugs*

    (must have been having a really ditzy blonde moment, I"m sorry)

    By Blogger The Witch Doctor, at 10:31 PM  

  • Chris and I both are so sorry for your loss also Les. As you know..since we have spoken in the past months.
    I am just now getting caught up on posts as we were away and then my laptop decided to go on vacation at the computer hospital.
    Hugs from us both!

    By Blogger moon, at 2:43 AM  

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