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Letters to Nowhere

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Another day in paradise

There has been a very hectic amount of absolutely nothing happening in my life lately.

I've applied for a promotion and there is ALOT of prework to do before I can be evaluated. So forgive me for not schmoozing as much as usual. I spoke to my supervisor today about making sure I wouldn't be disqualified for the job due to the fact I am not going to be at work for 10 days in Sept. He said, "Well I might need to call you in to do a presentation or something. If so I'll call you at home to let you know when to come in"

My amused laughter didn't please him. When he asked why I was laughing at that I told him it would cost the company at least $1000 for me to come in for one day and do a presentation. His look of shock set me to chuckling again. WHAT!!!! he says. That is when I calmly informed him I would be out of the country. Hmm ok... well we'll make arrangements for you then, he informs me. Thanks Jim, I appreciate that, really. I mean this IS the first vacation I've taken in 3 yrs.

I took my son down to sign him up for boy-scouts today. We are sitting in a hot and surprisingly crowded room listening to a woman that was approx 45 minutes older than dirt. Everyone else is dead silent since she was talking softly. At this point my lovely and cherished son leans over to pick something off the floor... and farts.. not a little "pbbt" fart... a "whoooooooooooonk pbbt pbbt" fart. It sounded like an 18 wheeler hitting his jake breaks. I was mortified. Everyone in the room cranes their necks to see who in the holy hell farted that loud and long. I've got my head down, my hand over my eyes, and shaking my head. My son takes this moment to say "Sorry mom, it was an accident" in a bright cheerful LOUD voice. Chuckles, giggles and a general wave of mirth flowed out from us like ripples in a pond. I would have welcomed a piano falling on me at that moment!

And, as if that wasn't enough, I was propositioned, in very crude terms, by a disgusting, dirty, and creepy guy while I was pumping gas after the boyscout meeting. My response of "I'd rather eat rat poison, and wash it down with battery acid" wasn't taken well. But, I think he got the hint. He wandered away mumbling something about fat bitches. My work here is done!

So how was your day?


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