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Letters to Nowhere

Thursday, August 05, 2004

35 days

In 35 days everything could change. Hopefully, it will improve, become even more. In 35 days, I might be with my beau, at least for a little while. There are variables that have to be factored. Some things hang on the balance of other actions, reactions, and possibilities. Yet, I'm hopeful. I don't think there is anything on my end that is a major obstacle.

OMG 35 days! Let's see I need to:
lose 20 lbs (lol ok maybe I'm not totally kidding but mostly I am)
decide and change my mind about what to take (approx 100 times)
Breath, breath girl.. it'll be ok! ok, ok, ok,
Find out for certain what I need to have on my person for the trip

Things I don't need to do but will:
Obsess about the flight (I've never flown)
Brutally critique every minor flaw I have before finally deciding I'm a pretty good looking woman. (rinse and repeat)
Panic at least 4 times that he won't like me
Worry at least once that I'm gonna throw up
Daydream about the meet before mocking myself for being unrealistic (I don't see him falling to his knees and worshiping in the middle of the airport.. well not in real life LMAO)
2 words... Crest White-strips

Pray for me. I'm already flaking out. Sad, isn't it, consider it a sign of my attachment lol. I can't wait. Really, I can't. I can't think of a better way to spend my vacation. Even if he's working during the day, a real possibility, I just want to be there.


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